GloucesterTimes.com, Gloucester, MA

Lifestyle

March 5, 2010

Rate your success at personal relationships

Nothing is more important in our lives than our relationships with others.

Successful relationships with spouse, partner, children, boss and friends are central to our overall physical and emotional well-being. As you may know, the most brutal form of punishment we can endure is to be completely isolated from others. We human beings are social creatures and are meant to survive and thrive in community with others. I have listed below some statements that may be of help to you in evaluating how successful you are in relationships and that may highlight some areas that you can you develop more fully.

1. I have a variety of satisfying relationships.

2. I freely give and receive love and support.

3. I feel comfortable in expressing my sexual needs and desires.

4. I enjoy touching and sharing physical emotional, and spiritual contact wit others.

5. I am comfortable with the masculine and the feminine parts of myself.

6. I have meaningful relationships with people of all ages, including children and elders.

7. I am in harmony with and share verbal and physical affection with members of my family.

8. I am willing and able to respond to the needs of my friends and family in general and in times of illness.

9. I take enough time to be alone and nurture myself.

10. I have a positive self-image which I express freely in relationships.

11. I am non-judgmental about non-orthodox forms of relationships, for example: homosexuality, bi-sexuality, celibacy, blended families, single-parent families.

12. I have worked out and healed past resentments about unsatisfying conflicts or experiences with family, friends and past romantic relationships.

13. I have learned to live with separation from and the death of loved ones.

14. I am open to important new relationships.

Below are the words of Bostonian and Lebanese-American Kahlil Gibran, an early 20th century philosophical essayist, and author of "The Prophet," that I think could apply to all relationships.

"Let there be spaces in your togetherness,

"And let the winds of the heavens dance between you.

"For the pillars of the temple stand apart,

"And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow."

Based in Rockport, personal coach Susan Britt, M.Ed., teaches individuals, families and couples to resolve relationship conflicts, achieve life and career goals, and accelerate personal growth. Questions and comments may be addressed to her at susanbritt1@verizon.net.

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