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January 25, 2013

Mother of twin boys worries they're too close for comfort

:Dear Abby: I am the single mother of identical twin boys. They insist on dressing alike and use their own secret language. I have always had trouble telling them apart. When they were young, it was cute, but as they are growing older I’m starting to worry.

They’re 12. When they oversleep, they shower together to save time. Their teacher took me aside during a conference and said they seem to be overly affectionate with each other and might benefit from some time with a masculine role model. When I questioned her, she said there is gossip that they were seen touching and possibly even kissing.

My research has brought up the idea of “twincest,” and I am worried my boys may be falling into these habits. How would you suggest making them stop? Everyone keeps suggesting separation, but they share a room and I don’t have another one or the money to build one. Help!

Mom With Two Much Trouble

Dear Mom: You obviously love your boys, but please stop worrying. According to David Baron, M.D. — an internationally respected psychiatrist at the University of Southern California — at this point one of the most harmful things you could do is to blow this out of proportion. Twins have a special bond. They feel safer with each other than with their peers. If this persists, consult a therapist, for your peace of mind if nothing else. But please do not jump the gun because of gossip.

Dear Abby: I wear dentures. I have never gone out in public without them. However, I have seen people I know take them out in restaurants, etc. It is not only awful to look at, but don’t they realize how they look? Am I shallow for not wanting anyone to see me without my “smile”? Is there some social etiquette that’s being broken?

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